Monday, September 06, 2010

The Islamic Plot to Take Over Kansas City

[Note: On Sunday, September 5, I preached a sermon on Islam and Islamophobia. Over the past several weeks and months I've been amazed and troubled by the craziness of the anti-Islamic hysteria that has become so prevalent in our national discourse. It is sheer lunacy! In light of all the claims that President Obama is secretly a Mulsim or where Iman Feisal Abdul Rauf receives funding, I decided to do a tongue-in-cheek, sarcastic slideshow during the worship service. The results were fairly immature, but also, I think, kind of funny.]

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Also, click here to read the sermon that went along with this slide show.

On Friday, September 3, I grabbed my camera and headed down to the Plaza in Kansas City. First I treated myself to a falafel sandwich for lunch. Then I set out to uncover the Secret Islamic Plot to take over Kansas City. [If you are not from Kansas City, the joke hinges on the fact that the Plaza, a popular shopping and restaurant district, is inspired by the Moorish architecture of Seville, Spain.]

First, I noticed this odd building with a gold dome:

But did you know that this building is modeled after a Moorish (Islamic) military structure?

Connect the dots, people! There is a Muslim military installation right in the heart of Kansas City. I also noticed this ongoing construction:

The triangular, tiled roofs are eerily similar to The Alhambra in Granada, a Moorish palace. Is this being built for the Muslim ayatollahs who plan to rule America?

But, it gets even worse. In the Muslim world there is a teaching against depicting the human form. Muslims developed tiles with intrictate and abstract geometric patterns. And you can find these tiles all over Kansas City!

Put the pieces together! The architecture on the Plaza conforms to Shariah law. But hold on a second. You are not going to believe this. This is a picture of La Giralda, a minaret that is nearly 1,000 years old:

And, here is an identical minaret on the Plaza:

It is extremely suspicious that this minaret is connected to a restaurant called The Cheesecake Factory. Are they making cheesecake or yellowcake?

What are they hiding? What secrets are they keeping?

Why don't more people know about this? Could it be that the secret is being kept because the media has fallen under Islamic control?

And, most sinister of all. I've learned that at schools across our country our children are being recruited to join al-Gebra.

[An aside: you might remember Danica McKellar as Winnie Cooper from the TV program The Wonder Years. Now she has authored a series of books about math for teenage girls. Before Hot X: Algebra Exposed she authored Math Doesn't Suck: How to Survive Middle School Math Without Losing Your Mind or Breaking a Nail and Kiss My Math: Showing Pre-Algebra Who's Boss.]

Yeah, I will admit that this whole slideshow was kind of immature and probably a little tasteless. But the point is that my "ground-breaking investigative photo journalism" has as much integrity as the anti-Islamic hysteria we find on cable news channels. And, if you want to see something truly funny, check out Keith Olbermann's piece: Obama Not the First Muslim President!